Kaoru's (now Kaworu) review of that fucking anime Fushigi Yuugi

#anime! buffer saved on Wed Mar 26 22:05:29 1997
<AvatarReb> You haven't even seen it bud.
<Kaoru> i've seen it
<Kaoru> that would detail spoilers but seeing as how agi ain't here, i'll go ahead anyways cuz nobody else here is really into fy anyways...
<Kaoru> dat bitch miaka and her boy toy tamahome go off to dat grave of the miko no whatever with her bro and his fag friend... meetin' up with da bald zenki monk looking guy, dey go and its raining and shit and then tamahome disappears... oh yeah, that stupid book gets stolen too...

<AvatarReb> go, on... everyone's seen the 1st one
<AvatarReb> that's the 1st 5 mins of the 1st one
<Kaoru> so he ends up in dat ancient chinese secret land of konan carpets again but it's like 70 years later and he goes to hotohori's castle but hes dead as dillanger like da rest of the seishi an there's this little brat king there... so they go to da shrine of da seishi but tama gets da access deny and gets kicked out... so da kid has his ass kicked and den thrown out of konan carpeting...
<Sunao> haha
<AvatarReb> still, the 1st OAV...
<prisoner> did he get thrown out for shoplifting?
<Kaoru> so that miaka bitch is all boo hoo hooing cuz she can't get none anymore and yui's like having her period or something cuz she's acting weird... eyes sideways back to tama who's wandering the windy desert like kane from kung fu and he meets some good looking bitch, who calls him nakago... end of one...
<Kaoru> can't steal carpeting man!
<Kaoru> oh, omake the whole cast is off to the onsen springs to have one giant sex orgy and they get into this scratching contest on the twins... 'nuff said

<AvatarReb> Still only the 1st OAV though.
<Kaoru> ok, so in two tama's lounging around this temple with this bitch, who wants his cock really bad cuz he's suppose to be nakago and he's a bad motherfucker and all that but he's not havin' none cuz he likes that pre-teenage miaka pussy better... so he's hems and haws and then those byakko guys show up who want to kick his ass cuz like he's evil tama or something... so tama goes terminator on their asses and takes em all out cept for the main dude cuz he's got
<AvatarReb> nice "edit"
<Sunao> Avatar: oh really? heheh
<Kaoru> but of course, tama's like EVA-01 and survives the explosion... even looks like eva coming out of the smoke and then he must be horny or something cuz NOW he wants to screw the pink haired bitch but then she turns into Tomo... always knew that make up wearing guy was a fag... so miaka SO horny that she's gotta go back so she goes over to yui's but she's in some premenstrual/wolf at moon action cuz she's got blue exorsist eyes and shit then she disappears...
<Kaoru> ok, does anybody here care if i describe the third fy oav?

<AvatarReb> just describe the omake bit and the end of 3.
<Kaoru> nah, i think i'll go on... screw da spoilers!
<Kaoru> so da omake of da second one is like them making it to da onsen and miaka's fag brother and his lover are all happy and shit... ends with tama and nakago kickin' da shit out of that blanka looking guy

<AvatarReb> no... the 3rd one, not the 2nd omake.
<Kaoru> the third oav is basically legends of the talking fushigi yuugi horny heads... tomo's found out and he runs away like a little makeup wearing faggot that he is and he's got dis new boss... an even prettier bad dude than nakago... but he kills tomo with this oldman flicking peanut shell action with this black pearl... then he shows up at dat temple and it's like a renunion casting or something... kinda like happy days only without potsie...
<Kaoru> so then that old wrinkley hag taito games or whatever shows up and it's like the whole gang's here... oh, and the two nubile horny bitches miaka nad yui are there too gettin' all wet in the panties and all that... so this evil handsome motherfucker intros himself and like they all want to kick his ass cuz he's more prettier than all of them... oh yeah all the dead seishi are back but they ain't like decomposed or anything cuz like you can never die in never
<Kaoru> so then it goes into legends of the galactic talking fushigi yuugi heads mode... i'm gonna kick your ass that, i'm the bad guy that, this is what's what blah blah blah... so then tama's gotta like stay in nevernever land so the story can be kept intact but miaka's all horny and shit and she hasn't gone to third base with tama yet so she's all boo hoo hooing when he give back her cheap 2cent ring that they were wearing together like they were in fucking high s
<Kaoru> then i guess miaka becomes a lesbian and gets the hots for yui cuz they go back clutching each other's breasteses and shit and crying and getting all hot and horny for tama but they can't have him which means they gotta settle for some zit faced real life high schooler (but i think yui's all hot over miaka's bro's fag friend...
<Kaoru> and that's pretty much the third oav altho i won't give the final final ending... the omake's basically all the guy cast members turning into fags cuz they dress up in miaka's clothes and shit, acting like Hatta and Komatsu... end of fucking story

<AvatarReb> bravo...
<Kaoru> hehe, that wuz my Kyousuke version... *bows to mentor*
<Kyousuke> kaoru: hehehe B)
<Kaoru> sank ya sank ya... i need toll money ^^
<Kaoru> hehe, don't show that to maria... she'll kill me ^^

<Kyousuke> kaoru: tell her to piss off then!
<Kaoru> i gotta have a copy of that log man... that was like some of my best work
End of #anime! buffer Wed Mar 26 22:05:29 1997